It’s not easy going into Rosh Hashanah, another year single. And really, the only thing to say to that is — Hashem knows it’s not easy.
This Rosh Hashanah davening, I’m not sure I’ll have the energy for “may-this-be-the-year.” I’m aiming for “help-me-always-feel-Your-closeness.” And really, Rosh Hashanah is not about shopping for the good stuff we want. It’s about crowning Hashem King over our inner lives. To tell Him, I’ll do the best I can with the tools I have to bring more of Your light into this world. To ask for another year to serve Him, from a place of health and strength, and to be granted the tools to serve Him best. And yes, we want one of those tools to be our zivug hagun. And Hashem knows that.
I’m looking forward to Yom Tov. I’ll be away for Rosh Hashanah for the first time (I think, ever) — I was just really ready for a change and it will be so nice to be with lots of relatives I don’t see often. I’m even looking forward to the 3-day Yom Tov…it’s like a total escape from reality. (This product makes things ok.) Also, I have always loved saying Tashlich.
So…even when it gets hard to put one foot in front of the other, there are some pretty awesome silver linings, I’m noticing.
Here is some R”H inspiration:
Rav Fischel Schachter always seems to say just what I need to hear.
And from an article by Rabbi Doniel Baron: “The sound of the shofar begins with a simple breath, and ends with a note, broken or straight…In describing those sounds, the Talmud uses metaphors of crying — a protracted sighing cry and uncontrollable broken weeping. That primal cry of the shofar reveals its secret. Mystical sources explain that the shofar spiritually expresses places in a person that words cannot reach.”
We don’t always have to have the right words. We just have to try, and the cry of the shofar takes over.
May you have a happy, meaningful, mindful Rosh Hashanah. May you feel able to daven well and to immerse yourself in the power of the day. May your tefillos be answered l’tova!
Wishing you a kesiva v’chasima tova and a gut gebencht yuhr!
Thanks for the good wishes! Smart of you to broaden your shul horizons, I had to dodge some awkward encounters this year!
Sometimes it can just get to you…but you’re not alone!