A friend shared a visual with me a few years ago that helped me see anger in a new and less stigmatizing way. Anger is like a suit of armor that shields you from experiencing softer and more painful emotions like sadness, grief, and disappointment. Anger is like the tip of an iceberg. When you look beneath the surface, you usually find other emotions that need compassion and validation. The iceberg conceptualization is from the Gottman Institute, and you can read more about it here. I think it is more helpful to deal with anger by working with the emotions under the anger, than by shaming yourself and feeling guilty for feeling anger.
