At this point, just about everyone’s lives have been turned upside down. With schools shut down, businesses shuttered, and flights cancelled, not to mention the social distancing measures, I’m getting so jittery. Weddings have had to be dramatically scaled down…and that got me thinking about what I would do if my wedding was taking place under these circumstances. It’s actually kind of fun to plan a small wedding if you’re doing it from scratch as the l’chatchila option. I don’t mean to minimize the distress of the kallahs and their families who are scrambling to put together Plan B 🙁 May Hashem shower them with an abundance of joy throughout their lives and may this be their most stressful crisis. But since we now have some advance notice of what weddings will look like for awhile, here’s my plan for a backyard wedding:
The Venue
I will borrow my friend’s yard. It’s not fancy but it’s large and private, which is a plus.
The Guest List
I challenged myself to keep it under 50 people (probably too many at this point), which basically means it’s immediate family and maybe 2-3 friends per side, plus mesader kiddushin, eidim, and photographer (yes, I’m taking this seriously). I guesstimated that the chosson’s side has roughly the same number of people as mine.
The Invitations
We’ll send out a text…but after the wedding, maybe I’ll mail out wedding announcements.
The Gown
I just spent way too long looking online for the perfect garden party bridal gown and I have concluded that it would probably be easier to make something. I am thinking something simple, like an a-line dress in white organza. Alternatively, I’m not opposed to wearing a sister-of-the-bride gown in a pastel color. I don’t think my mother or sisters have to wear gowns unless it’s super-easy for them to find something. These are strange times, my friends!
The Look
I always planned on wearing my hair all up. Hopefully I will find a hair stylist willing to work right now, and if not, my talented sisters will surely come to my rescue. Same for makeup (although I expect I’ll need to buy all my own products). And assuming they can be found, I will carry pink peonies 🙂 .
The Menu
This part is a little fuzzy but here’s what I have so far. I don’t want a formal sit-down meal where people will be too close to each other. I am thinking about setting up a tent with small tables, and serving a buffet of small sandwiches and beverages. And because I always wanted to do this, we’ll have doughnuts for dessert.
The Music
I think the simplest idea is to go with prerecorded music connected to speakers. It could be fun to curate a playlist. We will need to check in advance that all the technology works out…
The Schedule
Since the wedding is so small and pretty much all family, we’ll just take family pictures and head straight to the chuppah. (Badeken in my friend’s living room). And after that comes the food! I don’t think dancing is recommended right now, so we will skip 🙁 Maybe we’ll have some speeches instead. Maybe someone will prepare entertainment like a video of people wishing us mazel tov. Or we can play a game! (Am I forgetting anything important?) Anyway, I think this can be really sweet and beautiful.
What are your thoughts on at-home weddings? And planning weddings right now?
