My friend wrote this poem and so generously allowed me to publish it. Thank you!
Being single is a lot like being pregnant.
Walking around with a giant burden that everyone knows about.
Sometimes it weighs on you more.
Sometimes less.
Sometimes (like at family simchas) it kicks you in the stomach.
Sometimes it gives you heartburn.
Sometimes it keeps you up at night tossing and turning.
People think they KNOW what is going on in your life, just by looking at you.
Like the pregnant woman,
THEY obviously know that the biggest thing in your life is your singlehood.
They wait for the day when you will be married, just as they wait for the woman in labor to give birth.
Of course!
That must be what is on their mind now. No other issues can exist with singlehood or pregnancy.
Like financial issues.
Mental health Issues.
Family issues.
Health issues.
Real estate market in frum community issues
This single, she must be on edge about getting married, like the expectant woman is eager to give birth.
She, the older single is waayyyy overdue to get married.
What if the next exciting thing in that single’s life is:
The publication of her book?
Her new car?
Her new volunteer opportunity?
Her hobby turned lucrative business?
Her latest design revamp of her apartment?
A new friend?
A therapist that opens doors?
A vacation?
A special outing with her nieces and nephews!
How do you know what should be next in your life, the single’s life or the expectant mother’s life?
Life is a circle of concentric circles.
To see a single in her thirties as a ticking time bomb, is one dimensional.
Trust us, we are uncomfortable too. From the looks, the avoidance, the curiosity, the feeling like you know better, and that you know all.
As hesitant are you to say b’sha’a tova to that neighbor who looks like she just gained a little more weight, be as discriminating of your wishing a single “you should get married….it should be at the right time. B’sha’a tova!”
