Hey, all. It’s nice to be back here! Iy”H later this week I’m going to share a write-up about my trip with my sister and cousin – looking forward!
Today I wanted to ask about a topic I was discussing with a friend the other night — how was your seminary experience, in retrospect? For context, we are in our low 30’s, and it seems that more and more people we know are coming out of the woodwork to say that seminary wasn’t a great experience for them for a variety of reasons, from anxiety to loneliness to just being underwhelmed or confused about the whole thing to unfortunately experiencing abuse.
When I reflect on my own experience, I don’t regret going, but I have some complicated feelings.
The main gift of seminary for me was getting to spend time with my grandparents. I wasn’t close with them before seminary (they were a lot older than my other pair of grandparents and I spent less time with them) but in E”Y I formed a new relationship with them and had a special bond in the years afterwards.
I also already loved E”Y since my family had gone for the summer two years earlier (when I was 16) so it was meaningful to be back, and nice to have other people planning trips and feeding me (lol!).
In terms of the learning, at the time it was intellectually stimulating to me, and there were certainly some classes in particular that remain relevant to my life, but from the distance of time, I see that a lot of it was hashkafically confusing to me in the long run and probably made my spiritual journey more difficult. My seminary teachers doubtless were and are special individuals, and their intention was surely to inspire, not indoctrinate. But to an impressionable teenager, it sure seemed black and white.
I do believe that experiencing E”Y, and another culture, and being away from home for a stretch of time can be a valuable and maturing experience. I love the idea of helping my daughter plan an amazing trip, giving her a budget and letting her travel for a few months. I hope to raise a daughter who doesn’t need to be away from her family for nine months to be inspired by (essentially) strangers to live a more connected Jewish life.
I don’t know how this lands? I also wonder if this is different for people who were in seminary more recently. Would love to hear your thoughts!
