I once heard from Rabbi Moshe Weinberger that every tzara is harder at night – “al mishkavi baleilos” (from Shir Hashirim). I experience this so much. I find that some nights are beyond painful and I feel completely despairing. It’s physical, blinding pain. The morning usually does bring at least a glimmer of new hope. And I can continue for …
Late last night, I had a faintly familiar craving. I headed downstairs through the quiet house to the den on the first floor. I sat on the couch and read picture books out loud to an empty room. Then I went back upstairs and went to sleep.
The mythic successful older single works full time (preferably with children, in a job she can do part-time one day iy”H very soon to work around her future children’s carpools), but manages to be super-involved in community projects. She gives rides for bikur cholim and does kiruv on the weekends. She puts away 90% of her salary since she is …
I am amazed at the resilience of the human spirit. So many times, I have been sure there is no point in trying anymore. And I even promise myself I won’t make myself try anymore and spare myself the pain and the rollercoaster. Then a new day begins, a new song plays, and again I know and believe that everything …
My mother’s friend called her for advice for her friend who has four daughters in shidduchim. Since my mother has had various numbers of daughters in shidduchim for varying lengths of time, this woman thought my mother might have some insight into what her friend could “do differently” to help her daughters get married. My mother and I spoke afterwards …
Going down one of my rabbit holes on singlehood in the frum community, I came upon this article: “Best Practices for the Inclusion of Singles in Our Communities.” Love it and agree with every word! Would be nice to see something like this coming from the charedi corner, too, ngl. Let me know what you think!
Dear everyone who wants to redt a shidduch, That’s very nice of you. Please, when you email or text someone for their shidduch resume, remember to introduce yourself (unless you are in touch on a regular basis), provide some background/context (such as how you got their contact information, or why you thought of them), and let them know where …
I read a beautiful idea in Mary Pipher’s book Women Rowing North. When you are struggling with sadness or loneliness or hopelessness about the future, look around you for evidence of love in the world. I find amazing evidence of love all that time through my job. I work with people dealing with serious illness, and I hear stories about “ordinary” …
I have a file that I add to anytime I come across an interesting article, website, person, etc that relates to one of the topics I may write about. Of course I have many references to shidduchim/singlehood. Recently I came across an amazing study which was also written about in this op-ed:
Recently I finished another course in my therapeutic writing training, and I found the exercises to be particularly deep and moving. For one of the exercises we had to make a list of intersections in our lives, moments when we chose to go in one direction and not another. Then we explored one of those intersections more in depth and …
