We’re on an express train, aren’t we? Last week I did a mini review of the past two years (when I was in my MSW program) and it amazes me how the days are long but the years are short. So very many things happened (including COVID) but it all seems to have gone by so fast now that I’m looking back.
I also skimmed through old journals from the past three(!) years, and wow. It moves and inspires me to see how I grappled with different struggles over the years and yet I can now see how ultimately things changed and how I grew.
This time last year I chose to work on going to bed earlier, and I’m sorry to report that I did not make much progress in that area. However, I have been reflecting on a different accomplishment which I dubbed my “challahversary” — a year of baking challah each and every week. Does that count? I know it’s a mitzvah but does it count as growth if I was having fun? After all, I truly enjoyed doing it: the kinesthetic element of dough making, the feelings of competence and confidence I gained from learning how to do something well, the sense of community that grew with each batch of challah dough. My roommates, family and friends were (are) all in on the act.
In reflecting on all of the above, though, I realize that there are lessons I can take and apply to other areas of growth in avodas Hashem.
- Make it enjoyable. If you enjoy it, you have a greater chance of sticking with it and making it a part of your life. (Just a thought off the top of my head, many people have a hard time honoring shalosh seudos which is considered to be the pinnacle of Shabbos, so why not buy a new cookbook and dedicate it to trying new recipes for shalosh seudos?)
- Build a community around a kabbalah. Let people know what you are working on, share it and make it into a group project if you can. Post successes on a group chat, learn together where someone reads and posts a recording of a lesson a day, add some friendly competition or an accountability system.
- Set measurable goals, even if they are somewhat arbitrary. Back when I started baking, my friend read about a segulah to have 43 women do hafrashas challah as a zechus for a shidduch. While I did not attempt to get 43 people to bake for me, I did decide to bake for 43 weeks — and I did! At that point it was easy to just keep going. So I am.
As we look towards a new year, remember that it is a totally fresh start. Every Rosh Hashanah the world is recreated from scratch. Old patterns can be broken and dissolved. Old self-definitions can be cast aside to make way for shiny new ones. Old kabbalos and intentions can be dusted off, polished, revamped and renewed for a fresh beginning. This time of year is intimidating, but also empowering. We all have so much potential and if we find ways that work for us to help us grow and develop, we are unstoppable!
