Recently, I read Rules for Visiting, by Jessica Francis Kane, for a book club I facilitate at work. In this novel, the quirky protagonist, May, gets a few months off work and uses part of that time to visit old friends. She is inspired by online tributes she reads to the (fictitious) writer Amber Wright:
What was obvious in post after post was that Amber had a talent for friendship, which, I suddenly understood, was something that one could be good at, like cooking or singing. You could be good at being a friend, and no sooner had I had the thought, than I knew I was not.
My book group then discussed how to get better at being a friend and the conclusions were:
- Pay real attention to them, what’s going on in their life, what’s on their mind, things they like, etc.
- Be the one to reach out without waiting for them to initiate.
Relationships are one aspect (quite possibly the most important aspect) of a happy life. Did you know that the company of a friend can make inclines seem less steep? (Also mentioned in the novel!). Connection is lifegiving and in a lonely world, so valuable.
