My friends are so wise, so I wanted to share another bit of advice one of them gave me. I was telling her about something I started doing every week that costs a fair bit and is making a tangible difference in my life. She said:
“If something is working, keep doing it.”
As in: if debriefing with a coach helps tame your dating anxiety, keep doing it. If saying no to plans so you can get seven hours of sleep lets you function better, keep doing it. If therapy helps you stay grounded and integrated, keep doing it. Don’t stop doing it once it’s helped you. Keep doing it because it will continue to help.
I think we often rely too long on the effects of a past positive experience instead of regularly refilling the tank. It’s almost like we don’t want to indulge in too much of a good thing so we begrudge ourselves its continued use. In my experience I have seen that it’s more helpful to err on the side of too much self-care…because it probably isn’t too much; you know how they say that if you’re desperate for a vacation now, you needed one three months ago.
I’m paying for something now that’s really, really helping me, and each week when I swipe my card I just think of my friend’s advice…and keep doing it.
What life wisdom have you learned from your friends?
